I Miss you, Mama !

I miss you Mama

Happy Mother’s Day Mama !

I hope you can read this.

I miss your silly singing because of your funny lyrics.

I miss your funny anecdotes and savage commentaries.

I miss your weird Ilocana dishes.

I miss you Mama.

I hope that even we only “see” and “talk” to each other very few, I spark some smile and your memory of me as your rebel child.

I hope that even if things didn’t pan out the way you wish it to be with us your children, know that I love you so much.

Yes we did argue when you were still you but you taught me to fight for myself and not be a cry baby .Plus were kinda carnño brutal if we don’t care about each other we won’t spent a breath arguing.

I love you and I miss you so much.


I didn’t think I’d be tearing up as I write this caption on my Instagram post .  It looks like my missing you ingrained so deep in me that thinking of you crushes me so bad. Damn, I am still tearing up right now as I try to express my feelings for you.

I can’t forget the last time we were actually together physically.  It was the day we sent Tasha to the hospital.  Before the car who picked us up arrived you had I guess a moment of clarity when you were praying and crying “Please don’t take my grandchild away.  Take me instead.”.  That broke me so much but I can only focus on one important thing at that time, bring her to the hospital because she’s barely conscious.  Thinking of that time even if I wanted to comfort you that everything will be okay, I was unsure really, what was happening to her was something dangerously new to me.  I’m glad the mother instinct save her.

We haven’t seen you since then, I haven’t given you that comforting embrace and feel your warmth again.  You’ve always visited my dreams a lot and most of them I wake up with tear in my eyes.  I miss you so much.

I may be the kind some would think selfish because I go for my happiness , I remember when you still have your clarity, you advise us to chase your dreams, chase your happiness , let no one stop you from doing so.  You always said you’ve been there and done that, it’s time for us to go do it to.

Do what makes you happy, fight for what you believe is right and alwayss try tolto your best even if you feel the worst, are the three lessons you’ve instill on me.

I’m doing this Mama, I am.  I hope you are proud of me.

I love you Mama. I miss you so much.

Please know that even if we don’t see and talk to each other as often as we used to that I always think of you and love you more than anyone can possibly think I do.

I hope you have dreams of us , you children and grandchildren and remember us in your dreams.  That you have us.  That we love you. That you had a loving children and grandchildren and that you loved your life to the fullest and you should be proud of your accomplishments, as a mom and as a person.

I hope the people whom you’ve helped in the past remembers you and able to show their care now and hereafter.

I love you Mama!


P.S.  I learned a new skill while on quarantine Mama,. I can bake now!  I am sending you a cupcake I baked last night, a chocolate cupcake.  I hope you will like it.



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